I'm sure you are just like me. As I have moved through life, I have dreamed and "planned" at every stage.
Milestone birthdays that end in zeros and fives give us emphasis in looking at how we are doing. Getting married and having kids change our view as well.
I know when I was in my 20's, it seemed like "real" adulthood was still a ways off. And the thought of retirement was incomprehensible. So the thoughts of planning were fairly short sighted and involved things like concerts to attend and new mountain bikes to ride in far flung places like Big Bend. I wasn't a real deep thinker back then and I was simply enjoying whatever I could.
As I moved through my 30's, some of those expectations changed. I had the great disruptor called a divorce after my oldest daughter was born, and it changed how I viewed life. I now needed to be more responsible and had to think about making sure that precious kiddo was taken care of. But let's be real, I was still worried about concerts and mountain bikes.
While I was still in my 30's, I had the great fortune to get remarried to an amazing person. She still knows I need concerts and mountain bikes, but planning life began to change. We bought a house or two, had a daughter to give me two and then we subsequently started businesses.
All of these changes require tweaks to plans, requirements for money, and a different view on what the time horizon looks like. While I'm not there yet, I can see that retirement window coming more into focus. Thinking about the future has a very different frame of reference.
Change of Plans
But let's be more than real for just a hot second. Let's actually be raw about planning.
All of the planning I've mentioned above revolves around both my wife and I still in the family pictures together. Those we love can't fathom it any other way. And it is easy to live in that moment.
We make plans for the future that always includes us. But is that fully planning?
As I sit down to write this article, I find myself deep in the throws of what ifs. The worst kind of what ifs you can imagine.
If you check out our blog regularly, you may remember the story I wrote about my mother and my sister. We had to move my mom in with her and we have been confronted with end of life planning. When your loved ones have been able to thrive and live a long life, that kind of planning may not be the most appealing, but it is easier than it could be.
And that "could be" is where I find myself today.
My wife's family is currently dealing with the "could be" scenario in real time. You see, a fairly routine, yet complicated surgery has spiraled into an unthinkable scenario. The "could be" of all "could be"s.
What was supposed to be a couple of days in the hospital has turned into a "could be" that ends with making gut wrenching choices that impact the family for decades to come.
A husband and dad.
What is the plan now?
An Actual Plan
One thing my wife and I did several years ago was to put together a will, advanced directives, and obtained life insurance. Was it fun? Of course not. Sitting with an attorney, even if they are our friend, was not what I call a great Wednesday night. But we did it. Because it is that important to us. It is an act of love to our family so that they are not dealing with the real time "could be".
Now, many years later, we are sitting here asking ourselves if we have enough planned to make sure our family can just grieve if something were to happen to one of us. You see, trying to make sound, rational decisions when your spouse is laying in an ICU bed is impossible. Emotions and the corresponding brain chemicals cloud everything you see and do. You need to plan not only for the complete family pictures, but also for the unenviable picture that is at least one person short.
When you think about what can happen in the blink of an eye, you need to look at a few things. None of these items listed below are insurance products, but they are part of a bigger picture that will be peace of mind if the need arises.
Five End Of Life Items Every Texan Needs
- Will - No matter how simple or complex, help your family avoid probate and speed up settling affairs as they work through what comes next. If you have young children, it can ensure where and by whom they will be cared for if the biggest change happens.
- Durable Medical Power Of Attorney - This allows your family to make vital decisions about your care and what to do next if you are incapacitated.
- Declaration Of Guardian - This advanced directive allows you to specify now who does and does not have the ability to decide who, what, and how your treatment can be administered. It can also disqualify people from being involved in the discharge of your estate.
- Directive To Physicians, Family, & Surrogates - This advanced directive allows you to make your wishes about how to care for you if you become incapacitated. You and your spouse can remove the ambiguity in the moment and simply let the medical professionals do their job.
- Authorization To Disclose Health Information - This form allows you to specify who can legally know or not know about what is going on with your care.
These five items should be part of any plan that you have for your future. It is responsible to look forward to your career, retirement, and yes, your death as well. Don't leave these details to people who are hurting because they long to speak with you one more time. This is where my family is today. Some of these things are not in place and attempting to make decisions is honestly debilitating.
What About Insurance Planning?
Any good planner knows that looking at the future should include how it is to be paid for, and this where insurance products can be wildly beneficial. The only insurance policy that is ever guaranteed to pay out is a life insurance policy since we will all die at some point. How much, what kind, and different ways to structure it can all be accounted for, but the bottom line is that you need a policy of some sort. I've never met a widow that lamented that there was too much life insurance. Especially when thinking about how to sustain your family in your absence. These policies make sure that your family doesn't become homeless if your income isn't coming in and can also help in other ways like paying for college tuition, restarting a life, or making sure that all debt is eliminated.
Beyond that, there are other kinds of insurance that you should consider. Long Term Care Insurance can be stand alone or part of a life policy. It will cover the cost of care for you when you can no longer care for yourself. Disability Insurance can replace income if you can no longer work so that your lifestyle doesn't have to change. Finally, annuities can be a wonderful tool if you are worried about money management for your surviving family members.
The key is to have a plan before anything happens.
How To Get Started With Advanced Planning
The first step in this process is to identify the key individuals who can help you. You will need an attorney for some of these documents. You will need a licensed life and health insurance specialist who can navigate the policies. I highly recommend a competent financial planner who can make sure that funds are handled well after the plan is set in motion. Some people will be able to handle more than one of these aspects, but it is most important for you to be able to trust who is helping you.
At Insurance For Texans, we have friends who we can refer you to while also doing our part with the complex insurance questions. We take these situations personally because that is what we expect when trying to obtain help for ourselves. And we are feeling that right now.
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